Quora Answers: After No Contact

Learning To Laugh Again
April, 2019

How Long Has It Been Since You Went No Contact? How Are You Doing?

Last night, I came across the first answer I wrote on Quora about Narcissists.

At the time, I was just beginning to take baby steps toward rebuilding my life.

After months of self-imposed isolation, I was finally ready to become reacquainted with the outside world. Sort of.

I still had to be careful about my safety. I knew my narcissist ex was looking for me.

And that if he found me, he was going to try to kill me again.

So I ventured into the world via social media.

It seems strange to look back and realize how far I’ve come. There are lots of transitions when you start changing your entire life.

It’s easy to forget to stop and smell the roses along the way.
To overlook the little victories that once loomed like insurmountable obstacles.

But sometimes in life, you need to pat yourself on the back. To be proud of who you are and what you’ve done.
Sometimes, it’s necessary to just poke fun at yourself.
And to laugh at the dumbass mistakes you’ve made.

Look back with fondness at who you once were.
Not contempt for the person who fell short of what you wanted to be.

When I wrote this answer, I did not yet know what direction my life was going to take.

I only knew that I planned to go forward.

Thankfully, I’ve managed to do that. But definitely not without bumps in the road.
Lots of times I fell flat on my ass without knowing how to get back up.
I learned, though. You just take one step at a time.

Before long, you’re right where you need to be.
Even if you don’t know how you managed to get there.

“You can’t go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending.”

C. S. Lewis

How Long Has It Been Since You Went No Contact?
How Are You Doing?

November 30th was the last time I talked to him.

It was on the phone.
By then, I‘d been gone for a few days, and he tried to guilt me into coming back.
So I ended the call, blocked his number, and have maintained No Contact ever since.

At this point I’m doing pretty well.
I have a new apartment in a gated community.

And I’m learning to think for myself.

I have good days and bad, of course.

But at least the good ones outweigh the bad.

I still feel somewhat disconnected.

I also have trouble staying focused.

An amazing thing happened recently.

I learned how to laugh again.

I could go on for days about all the obstacles I’ve faced.

And how hard it is to heal.

I prefer to think positive, though.

No matter what life throws my way now,
I can handle it.

Because it’ll never be harder than what I’ve already survived.

Serena Prince On Quora

March 17, 2019

Less than a month later, he found me.

It was 2:00 in the morning, April 12, 2019.

I couldn’t sleep, so I started cleaning the kitchen.

I took the garbage out, but still had one more bag.

I left the side door unlocked.

For less than 2 minutes!!

All of a sudden, the door opened.

The monster just waltzed in like he owned the place.

I screamed. And he laughed.

The maniacal look in his eyes told me I was in trouble.

Fortunately, my son and I had a safety plan.
We knew this day would come.

We just didn’t know when.

The arrogant narcissist had completely underestimated our desire to stay free of him.

He forced me into my bedroom, ready to teach me a lesson.

This sounds so cliche, but it really was like a movie.

The Calvary arrived, with guns drawn.

Colton had followed our safety plan and gotten help.

It was truly a beautiful sight to see the narc being escorted to a squad car in handcuffs.

He’d had a loaded 9mm pistol and a knife on him.

Nothing else. No wallet or keys.

Just the knife and gun.

Along with a full clip and bullet in the chamber.

Excerpt from: What Is The Best Way To Make A Narcissist Think Twice Before Attacking Or Abusing You?

July 10, 2020

Today, I use my experiences to help others.

I’m an Advocate for Victims of Narcissistic Abuse, and I coach survivors throughout the various stages of healing. It’s extremely rewarding, and I’m blessed to have the opportunity.

I continue to answer questions on Quora and write regularly with the hope of Raising Awareness and Understanding.

I published a book about narcissists a couple of months ago and donate half the proceeds to a fund for victims.

Along with Mohammad bin Salman, the Crown Prince of Saudi Arabia, I‘m a co-founder of A Global Partnership.

The fund was established to provide financial assistance for Victims of Narcissistic Abuse in Emergency Situations.

I feel fortunate that some good things have happened as a result of my descent into hell.

To those of you suffering from the hopelessness and depression associated with Narcissistic Abuse, I know it’s hard to believe you’ll ever recover.

It’s true that you won’t ever be the same. Losing your innocence changes you forever.

But you can become a better version of your old self. A much stronger, much wiser version.

I used to think I’d never be a whole person again. I felt damaged beyond repair and didn’t know who I was anymore.

For so many years, my thoughts and actions were based on my husband’s possible reactions. I stayed on High Alert, trying to avoid his terrifying rages and inhumane abuse.

Constantly living in fear alters your brain chemistry.

It destroys your spirit and erodes your soul.

You become a shell of your former self. Someone who is surviving, but definitely not living.

It was only after I escaped the nightmare that I could accurately assess the damage and begin to heal.

Recovering from Narcissistic Abuse is a long, fickle process.

You must begin a painful journey toward self-discovery that requires lots of hard work, soul-searching, and self-reflection.

However, the benefits are very much worth the effort.

These days, I’m in a really good place.
For the first time in my life, I’m happy with who I am and the direction my life is heading.

I also found true love. Not that fake, desperation-filled, narcissist crap I’d always mistaken for love.
I’m finally experiencing the real thing.

It’s more beautiful than I ever imagined, and I thank God every day for such a precious gift.

Unlike a Narcissist, I’m not an empty vessel that can never be filled.
I get to experience that priceless emotion known to restore the soul.

Because I can form real bonds and attachments to others, I won’t ever have to fake my emotions.

While I’ll never have pity for Narcissists, I do understand why they’re miserably unhappy.
Think about it.

To never know the fulfillment that love brings would make life meaningless.
And I’m not talking about just romantic love.
To never get to feel any kind of love. That would really suck.

Narcissists won’t ever experience the overwhelming emotion from deep in your soul that you get when you look at your kids.

They’ll never understand the exhilaration from seeing the unconditional love and trust in your child’s eyes.

No wonder they’re jealous of normal people with normal emotions.
Looking at it from that perspective, maybe I should have some pity for them.

But I don’t. Not even a tiny bit. If anything, I want to say HAHAHAHA!!

Serves ’em right for being such abusive assholes.

#serenaprince375 #saudiprince #bestpartner4ever❤️ #circusworthystunts

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